slowly crawling back to internet life

Well, I up and moved to Seattle, and since then I've been trying to pull my life together again amidst a breakup and a funeral. I had no energy in keeping up with Internet goings-on until I got myself centered again, so I was often offline except for answering emails once a day.
I was re-reading some of my past Michael readings, and I found this one passage from last November in answer to my concerns about choosing the right career direction after I move up here. It totally describes what I went through (and still am) after I moved out of a friend's place and into my own apartment.

Michael (channeled by Karen Murphy):
"We do see a trend toward moving into being more trusting, not only of yourself but also of the universe and life in general, and of course there is pain and fear involved with establishing that trust. Security is a need for you at this time, and working through that need, working yourself into a place where you can feel you are creating your own place from which to trust, will be a theme for a time for you."

When I finally got into my own place, I went through a good week and a half of intense panic and anxiety. It was all compounded by fears about my job situation, my savings trickling away, being completely on my own for the first time, and having almost no friends around to spend time with (face-to-face). Part of my fears about my job situation came from trying to find a retail job in a university area (too many young people = too much competition), and I realized quickly that it would not pay the bills. I didn't trust that things will work and and didn't trust that the universe will take care of things and not let me starve. I thought I had gained that trust in all the spiritual work I've done, but when it came down to it, I was still blindsided by my irrational fears.

Thankfully it didn't last too long. I called up some of my LA friends, and they helped me put things back into perspective and reminded me of all the work I've done. I am grateful for my friends in the spiritual community.

I still get the doubts and fears occasionally, but it's not nearly as bad as those first couple of weeks. I'm definitely learning to trust more, to trust that things will be taken care of without my having to do all the work (because I can't). Things are still slow, and I still feel lonely because I have too much time in the day. But I think it'll get better from here.