a little sparrow

A few weeks ago on Saturday, I found a sparrow caught in a glue trap that my dad had left out in the yard. We had mice, you see. He caught one mouse and was trying to get a second one, had no luck, and moved the glue trap out to the yard and left it there for whatever reason (my guess is the pack rat syndrome, as usual). At first I thought the sparrow was dead, but at second glance it was alive though not struggling. Its tail feathers had come off, and the bottom half of its body and both wings were covered in glue.

I went inside and asked my dad to get it off the trap. He did and then put the sparrow, glue and all, in an old bird's nest from some years ago that was still sitting in our yard (what did I say about pack rats?). I told him, "it can't fly if we don't wash off the glue!" And he said, "you can't wash it off. Just give it some water and feed it." And what, until it dies of shock?

I tried to see if I can wipe off the glue with a cloth and some water. No luck. I went online to look up what to do with a bird caught in a glue trap (thank God for the Internet) -- they said you can get the bird out by applying cooking oil to the glue, but other than that, you can't do much besides taking it to an animal shelter.

I had some internal resistance to this -- Chinese culture is not very animal-friendly, and my family taught me that you don't waste resources on animals and don't go out of your way to help them. My first reaction was that it was too much trouble to take it to the Humane Society, which was a 15-minute drive (and Animal Control wasn't picking up the phone on Saturdays). But I couldn't just leave it and wait for it to die, so I made a decision and found some cloth to carry the sparrow with.

I picked up the sparrow with the cloth and held it in my hand. He was this little warm body trembling in my hand, and his vulnerability made me stop in awe. I loved him at that moment and knew I was doing the right thing. As I got in the car and drove, I thought, if I can care this much for a sparrow, what about the birds and cows and pigs who die for my food? How can I eat meat again without feeling like a hypocrite?

Well, shit.